Resolved Question: what does this sound like to you? Advice Pleassee?!?

I have been going through a lot lately,I’m a 19 year old female.. i work,go to college, do a placement, homework, watch my brother and my grandma because my mom works three jobs seven days a week, my dad is dying, and we’re going to lose the house because my dad’s unemployment runs out in December. I’ve had anxiety for years and slight paranoia due to my past cocaine and ecstasy addiction (i haven’t used in over 2 years)…but things are just strange now..I’m losing it. I’ve never felt so detached from myself in my life..
lately I’ve noticed I’m not myself, i constantly feel like I’m in a dream and things aren’t real, I’m nervous 24/7, i do routine checks around the house to make sure the stove is off and what not..I’ve even left my house and came back because i was afraid i left something on although i didn’t use anything..umm..i think so negatively such as imagining vividly that my mom died, thinking about it so much i start to believe it..i will literally get upset. I zone out all the time, i cant sleep or cant stop sleeping, my weight goes up and down a lot. I’m currently taking lorazepam as needed…usually just to help me sleep. I just feel like I’m going crazy..i feel that I’m losing control…please help?

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