So, firstly I must admit that I have had an addiction to alprazolam(Xanax) for almost two months now. It started with a few .25mg footballs per day just to curb the anxiety, then progressed into 4-5 a day. Well, once my dealer(roommate) started getting the bars (2mg) I started taking those. I would pick up once a week, about 7 bars(enough for one per day) and would break them up into fours, snorting a quarter and swallowing a quarter as needed. Well, the other night(2 nights ago), I started my night as usual.. Cracked open a modelo, snorted a quarter of a bar, swallowed a quarter and turned on some music as my friends were driving over with a handle of Seagram’s Whiskey. Needless to say, the cocaine was brought as well. From this point in the story on, it is all what I’ve heard from the people who were there. From 11pm to 4am I had consumed roughly 1 24oz modelo, 10 shots of seagrams, and about 3/4 a gram of cocaine. This is where the story gets odd. For some reason or another at roughly 4am(I cannot remember and still cannot figure out why I would do this), I got into my roommate’s bottle of Xanax bars, took the remainder(18, or 36mg) into the upstairs bathroom, and swallowed them all. From what I hear, I seemed coherent, though my friends tell me occasionally I would say “it’s coming in waves, big waves”. Anyways, I don’t remember much of this, though I did wake up with a pool of blood around my face on the carpet, and still felt very very supressed by the feeling. I’ve spent the last few days since the incident trying to recover; no alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, or friends over. I find myself in a strange state, and I feel lucky in a way to be alive… I could’ve sworn that more than 25mg of alprazolam can kill you, not to mention the other things I consumed. Would anyone be keen to give me an explanation to why I’m still here?