Open Question: why do people allow addicts to give sad excuses for their actions.?

I have been married for 25 years, and i am tired of the sad excuses people give to why they are such butts during the Holiday season. They drink to much, they go back and binge on drugs and they expect everyone to say that this is ok. B.S. These holidays i plan to say no to people who can not find away to have a good time without being an liability to everyone else, who just want to have fun. Yes i drink one drink if it is possible. So why do i say this? my vent: I grew up with a father who was a drug dealer,and a alcoholic. Mother was addict to cocaine. 1 sister 2 brother heroin, meth, and pot. My daughter is now a drug user ( i have custody of 2 of her children. suspect i will have the last by christmas.) My Husband is an alcoholic ( this is a fight every holiday). So i will take my grandchildren to a motel for thanksgiving ( indoor pool a must) and we will party and swim watch movies and sign christmas cards and yes mail them because life is to short to live in the control addiction.So i make my choice to live not just for me but for my Grandchildren and for those of you who read this and you can’t stand for yourself. Stay of a sober mind and of good heart I know that it is hard but you will make it through. And may you have a happy thanksgiving!