Open Question: what am i meant to do? be mad or understanding? please your help is needed?

i met a man who is younger than me by 12 years.but i love him and i cant help but have these deep feelings for him.ive 3 kids who enjoy him being around.its all natural and it feels so right.i know theres an age gap but it doesnt bother me at all
however we have been together 4 weeks but hes always been around from day 1.we bothe clicked the day we met .then we argued very emotionally,over my insecurity .i felt threatened if he spoke to another woman
anyway we got back together and he brought his brother along.who has very extreme mental problems and needs his brother my bofriend when he gets his confulsions
a lot of problems with this family,my boyfriend has now openly admitted he has a drug problem as well as neating an alcohol addiction.still i love him,and he says he loves me too.just his brother and mother seem to be in need of him all the time .his mum will phone and say his brother neds him as he does self harm.and my man is there like a shot
despite all this he seems to always be in constant demand of his mum and brother.
we have been together nearly 4 weeks
yet only once have we made love
i did think cocaine was rumoured to be a sexual drug too
we made love once.just i want more ,more gripping passion as i need that i am only human
he said before going back to his mum s that he was gonna stay with me for a few days
he returned from his mams with no bags ,nothing.,we were having a heart to heart about how things were going to be for us with him giving up coke.anyway then his mam phoned and said his brother was in town drinking and wasnt feeling good
then suddenly a phone call of his mam saying his brother needed him
he had to go back home to go with his mum to see to his brother
i was gutted ,as i want him sexualy to but he just seems to want cuddles and we kiss passionatly but nothing happens
so now tonight before he left in a hurry,i felt alone and unwanted with him saying he knew id react like this and i ended up thinking of the last tiem we argued and he took all his things and said he would be back the next day but never did
just nw he took his stuff even his deodrant and kissed me saying dont think bad thoughts i love you,but he took everything he left here like clothing and his lap top
now im so down and when i phoned him he told me to go to bed and he would be with me in the morning or get a babysitter so i could be with him wherever he was
then he said i love you sweetheart
now im so so confused and hurt
passion for me makes me feel wanted ,jsut nothings happened ? what do i do be gentle i do love this guy and he is the 2nd person to share my feelings back
i must say that my kids are never and are not at risk their mum and i deeply care for this guy.however my kids will always be my first love.i was just asking whether i stay supporting this man or leave him be.
we all make mistakes and i believe that showing him my total love will help him through this ordeal.
the first answer ive recieved is a bit too hard hitting for my liking and im not going to ignore the content of this answer.i believe that your corncern is for my kids.but please im a woman whos a mum first .theres no drugs of any kind involved around my kids.even the man in question dosent do this at my home
im not the one with the habit it so happens to be the man i happen to love that has the problem and he is willing to get help and get of them for the sake of me and my kids and himself

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